Flyin' High
Jun
12
Written by:
6/12/2011 6:19 AM
Now a short distance away from my home island and very high over the Pacific Ocean en route to Las Vegas, I am unable to return my tray table to its original position, tucked away in a compartment under my armrest, as the gentleman next to me was gracious enough to show me. "No matter, I'll work around it," I said to myself. As a bonus, there's not much work to be done on an airplane alone, aside from your too-close neighbors and, in this case, my wonderful girlfriend who is a flight attendant for this very airline (Hawaiian, naturally), on this very flight (#18). That said, this stupid table is making me look--or at least feel--like one of those buffoons who has never traveled before and approaches every otherwise natural occurrence with clumsy suspicion. Thankfully I still remember how to use the seat belt and lavatory from my jet-setting days that were recent enough to still feel fresh in my mind.
Another somewhat tilting thing is that I am seated in the bulkhead, directly behind the back wall of first class on this airbus. The mesh "screen" that looks and feels like a fishing net (and who doesn't have one of those lying around? How else would us Hawaiians catch our dinners?) is a poor excuse for a divider, providing me with a clear view of the lucky bastards receiving their never-ending stream of care, from wine, to cookies, to filet-mignon and lobster, to, is that? it is! a guy getting a blowie from the flight attendant. Where is Leslie Nielson when you need him?
I really have no right to whine. This flight cost me all of $39 and change. And like my dad always says to the ricer kids who zoom past him on the freeway, we are all going to the same place--the stop light at the end of the off-ramp. But what are we, as card gamers, who live and die by variance (or maybe , no matter how hard we try to control it, to do but find the most petty of things to whine about? Here's another one: my breath is funky from the dim sum I just ate, provided by my flight attending girlfriend. If I weren't locked into this stupid chair by this stupid tray table I'm too stupid to figure out, I might be able to go and get the gum from my bag residing in the overhead compartment. I could ask anyone for help, including Lea, as she's come to visit a few times during the writing of these few paragraphs, but alas.
In the waiting room I spied two men with shirts similar to the one I'm wearing. One of them, slightly older, actually is wearing the exact same shirt I am. Obviously we are now sitting in the same row. I'll probably see him a few times in whatever seedy places I decide to visit on my trip. And by probably, I mean definitely.
I feel like a small child, full of nervous energy as I anticipate seeing my Rob, my Tim, my Niles, Kirk, Eric, Brian, and everyone. Our flight arrives late tonight, and while I'm sure some of them will still be awake, likely burning the midnight oil in Tim's dungeon, they will have to wait until Saturday to be graced by my presence, as we kick off Concentration Draft Camp in style. Tim is letting them out of the dungeon for a few hours so that we can have a bbq or party or something. I'm sure the time in the sunlight will recharge the batteries of those enslaved, so that they can get back to the business of breaking it.
Stay tuned. If you're lucky, you might get to hear the legend of Niles and the Chipotle Challenge. If not, maybe just a picture of Rob. Shirtless.
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